Life isn’t easy, and when you’re dealt lemons, Tip # 8 encourages us to make some lemonade. Right now all of us are in the largest crisis of our lives. To say that we were dealt lemons is a gross understatement, but we must make lemonade in the meantime.
As writers, you may ask, “What does that looks like?”
Relationships
Life is all about relationships, and the success of our books is all about relationships as well:
Relationships between our characters,
The feelings we stir between our readers and our characters (also a relationship), and
Marketing our books.
With today’s on-the-go society, very few families spend time together. The Stay-at-Home Order has provided an opportunity for families to spend time together and hopefully strengthen those relationships. Of course the opposite is possible, but we’ll be hopeful that’s not the case.
In today’s high tech society, we have the opportunity to reach out to each other electronically to continue our social interaction with others and deepen those relationships. It is also placing those who were not technically savvy to become more proficient. As writers, those are critical tools.
Emotions
It’s hard to make your characters’ emotions “real” without experiencing those emotions yourself. The COVID-19 pandemic has put us all in a position to feel emotions we may never have experienced — EXTREME, to say the least. We can use those emotions we feel to make those emotions “real” in our characters.
More Writing Time
Under normal circumstances, quite a few writers are not able to write full time because they still have to support themselves and their families. With the Stay-at-Home Order in place, those who are unable to work, have more writing time. Those who are now working remotely, can use their drive time for writing.
Support
There are so many concerns and variables associated with those concerns. Some of us have “children” who are on the front lines of this battle. My daughter is a neurosurgery resident who is in the forefront, along with the daughter of a fellow writer in my writers’ group, Jill Haymaker, whose daughter is an ER doctor.
Prayer is our sword and comfort. The medical staff are the heroes in this battle and need our support and prayers.
Let us stand together as a community of writers and lend a hand of support, encouragement, and prayer.
What recommendations do you have to pay our support forward?
This incredible APODS Series, written by Amanda Cabot is a must read for not only writers, but EVERYONE and I recommend you apply APODS to your life. I am a writer and a practicing attorney, and I found it extremely useful in mine. This post will take you through a summary of each article and a link where you can find more. Even if you’ve been following along, I highly recommend reviewing this Series again. Thank you Amanda for sharing your invaluable expertise!
This article is the first in the series on time management and getting to the end. Although time management is only one part in the multifaceted solution to getting to the end, it’s an introduction to a system that goes by the acronym APODS — Analysis, Priorities, Organization, Discipline and Support. Get a quick peak at each of these five areas.
To address priorities, you need to first establish those priorities, understand the opportunity costs of those priorities, and accept the fact that we cannot do everything.
This article focuses on ideas gleamed from Marilyn Paul’s book, It’s Hard to Make a Difference When You Can’t Find Your Keys. Amanda discusses 4 of her points she found particularly useful.
Support is the final step in the APODS Series. You will not want to miss this article!
This Series has been an invaluable resource for so many, especially me. What did you find most helpful?
Amanda Cabot is no stranger to getting to “The End.” She juggled a sixty-hour a week job with nonnegotiable deadlines and building a house long-distance at the same time that she wrote two books a year. Whether or not she kept her sanity during that time is debatable. Amanda is the best-selling author of over thirty novels, eight novellas, four non-fiction books, and what she describes as enough technical articles to cure insomnia in a medium-sized city.
Out of the Embers, the first of the Mesquite Springs trilogy, has an official release date of March 3, but it’s currently available for preorder at all the major online retailers. If you prefer brick and mortar stores, your local bookseller should be able to order a copy for you.
At last! We’ve reached the final
step of APODS: Support. Some of that support is external, but you may be
surprised to learn that a large part is internal.
Although writing is by its very
nature a solitary profession, there are times when we need help if we’re going
to reach “The End.” That’s why it’s important – I’d go so far as to say
essential – to have external support. Typically, that support comes in two
forms: personal and professional.
Personal – These are your
cheerleaders, the people who encourage you on bad days, who celebrate your
successes, who are there whenever you need the reminder that you’re a real
writer. They may not be writers – in fact, most often they are not – but
they’re the ones you can count on to cheer you when writing isn’t going well.
Professional – I’m a firm
believer that every serious writer should be a member of a group of
professional writers. Ideally, the organization has in-person meetings that you
can attend, but if that’s not possible, find one with an active email loop.
Your professional support group is
more than a group of cheerleaders, although they should cheer your successes.
What they provide that the personal support group cannot is writing-related
advice. They’re the ones who’ll brainstorm with you when you hit a mental wall.
They’ll read a passage and tell you what works and what doesn’t. They’ll buoy
you when you face rejection, suggesting other agents or publishers. They’re the
proverbial shoulders to cry on, and they’re invaluable.
But, as valuable as external support
is, it’s only one part of the picture. You, the author, need to support
yourself. After all, no one else is going to write your book. Although there
are many times when you’ll need internal support, we’re going to discuss the
two most common.
The Muse is MIA
It happens. You’re excited about the
book, but then the wellspring of ideas dries up. Or, as a fellow author says,
there’s nothing in the well but kitty litter. Not good. So, what do you do?
Take time out.
Step away from the computer, leave your office or writing space, and do
something totally different. Go for a walk; read a book; watch a favorite
movie. Your goal here is to let your subconscious work while the rest of you
plays.
Talk to the animals.
This is the time to find a confidante who won’t talk back to you, who won’t
offer suggestions. While you’re grooming your dog or petting your cat, explain
the problem. Tell it what’s happening in the book and what isn’t happening.
Note: you need to be talking aloud, not simply thinking. There’s probably some
scientific explanation of why verbalizing a problem helps solve it; all I know
is that it’s an effective technique. What do you do if you’re like me and don’t
have a pet? Talk to an inanimate object. The key here is to have a
non-judgmental audience that can’t walk away.
You’ve Received a Rejection
Again, this happens. I won’t
sugarcoat it. Rejection hurts, and if you receive enough rejections, you may
consider abandoning the whole idea of writing. Don’t do that.
I’ve been known to say there’s no
problem so big that chocolate can’t fix it. That is admittedly an exaggeration,
but it’s worth considering. While you’re bingeing on Godiva, I recommend the
following:
Remember that grieving is a process. It’s only natural to grieve when you receive
a rejection. After all, your story isn’t simply words stored in cyberspace.
It’s part of you. Recognize that you’ll go through the same predictable stages
as if you’d lost a loved one:
Shock
Anger
Resistance
Acceptance
Hope
Understanding the
SARAH model can help you cope with your feelings and avoid damaging your
future. Never, ever, ever respond to rejection when you’re still in Shock or
Anger. It’s one thing to call someone in your personal support group and bemoan
the sheer idiocy of the editor’s reaction to your story, quite another to vent
those feelings to the editor.
Open your “what’s
special about me” envelope. You have one of those, don’t you? If not,
you need to start one right now. Every time someone compliments your writing,
save the comment. It doesn’t have to be an effusive endorsement. It might be
nothing more than, “That line of dialogue is terrific.” All that matters is
that it’s a positive affirmation of you as a writer. Whether you keep a printed
copy of the compliments or store them electronically isn’t important. What is
important is to keep the affirmations readily accessible for those times when
you need to be supported.
When You Reach “The End”
Eventually, if you’ve persisted,
you’ll reach “The End,” and your manuscript will be complete. What’s next? I
recommend the Two Cs.
Celebrations – Without a doubt, you should celebrate having finished your manuscript. This is the time to gather with your support groups and rejoice in the knowledge that you’ve accomplished something that’s only a dream for many others. You’ve finished a book. Wonderful, fabulous, spectacular. Time for fireworks, champagne, and another pound of Godiva.
Commencement – “The End” of a book should not be the end. Instead, once you’ve finished celebrating, it’s time to begin a new story. You’re a writer. You’ve proven that by reaching “The End.”
(c) 2019 Amanda Cabot
Amanda Cabot is no stranger to getting to “The End.” She juggled a
sixty-hour a week job with nonnegotiable deadlines and building a house
long-distance at the same time that she wrote two books a year. Whether
or not she kept her sanity during that time is debatable. Amanda is
the best-selling author of over thirty novels, eight novellas, four
non-fiction books, and what she describes as enough technical articles
to cure insomnia in a medium-sized city.
Her most recent release is A Tender Hope, the third in the Cimarron Creek trilogy.
Today is the start of a new series, Publish Don’t Perish — 65 Tips, in honor of my parents’ 65th wedding anniversary. Sixty-five years ago today, my parents were married. But wait, isn’t today Halloween? Well, yes, but 65 years ago Halloween was not celebrated on Sundays, the day my parents said, “I do.”
Sixty-five years…WOW! With almost 50% of marriages ending in divorce or separation, there is much to learn from this incredible couple after 65 years of marriage. Fortunately, I am blessed in more ways than I can count because they are my parents. For purposes of this series, we’ll focus on what they provided me and continue to provide me in Tip #1: Support.
Types of Support
There are many types of support, including financial, emotional, and personal assistance to name a few. Our family has been blessed by my parents who have supported each and every one of their children and grandchildren throughout all of their lives in more ways than I can count.
I have a passion for writing, and a writer’s life can be a lonely life. It’s critical to surround yourself with those who will come along side and support you in your endeavors with encouragement, laughter, shared tears, a break… . We all need cheerleaders in the ups and downs along the journey to publication — success doesn’t come over night in the life of a writer, and life itself is usually not a bed of roses.
My parents supported me throughout each stage of my life with every type of support and encouraged me to keep writing. Thank you, Mom and Dad! You continue to be my biggest fans!
Other Writers
What better group to obtain support than other writers who understand and have experienced similar ups and downs. It’s one of the reasons I started Thyme for Writers in 2017. Over these past couple of years, I’ve had the opportunity to share the experiences and helpful hints provided by this remarkable group. After all, it’s not healthy to write in a vacuum.
Many of the tips gleaned in this series, will come from what I have learned from my incredible parents and other writers. In the meantime, rally your support team — family, friends and fellow writers who keep us pumped up and moving on.